crybaby award

[TerraFrost]

this is rather stupid...

Coaches in Hot Water Over 'Crybaby' Award

Terence Philo with the "Crybaby Award" given to his son. The name on the trophy is mispelled.

PLEASANTVILLE, N.J. (May 4) - The coaches of a middle school basketball team who humiliated one of their players by giving him a "crybaby award" will likely face disciplinary action from district officials.

The 13-year-old boy's coach called him just before last month's team banquet and told him to make sure he attended because he was getting a special trophy, the boy's father said.

At the event, the boy watched as all of his Pleasantville Middle School teammates received trophies or certificates.

He was then called up to receive his award, and a coach told the crowd that the boy was being honored because "he begged to get in the game, and all he did was whine."

The trophy had a silver figure of a baby atop a pedestal engraved with the boy's name, which was spelled incorrectly. Family members said the teen - an honor roll student - was so embarrassed that he stayed home from school on the following Monday.

Edwin Coyle, superintendent of the Atlantic County district, said he would recommend that the unidentified coaches receive some type of punishment. He planned to address the matter at Tuesday night's Board of Education meeting.

"I was very upset and dismayed that our coaches would take an opportunity to belittle or lessen the self-esteem of our athletes," Coyle said.

the fact that they got a trophy suggests that they went out of their away, and perhapes even genuinly thought it was cute (as opposed to insulting), but the fact that they misspelled his name... perhapes that was an accident, too, but... it's getting harder and harder to see good intentions, the farther in the paragraph one reads, heh.

[Dev]

Wait.... I rememeber reading this. Did you post this before or just now?

[ChatOmbre]

*beats them with a fish* gah...

[Roadkill]

That's high school level joking. This thirteen year old just wasn't psychologically mature enough to have a little fun. I mean we gave one of our wrestlers (Big Head) a bobblehead trophy, with a big head.

The crybaby award was a chance at a little social fun for the kid. I cannot believe he just couldn't flow with the joke. Trying hard to be in the game isn't bad, and this, being an awards banquet, was not discouraging him from it in any serious way, but was just poking a little harmless fun.

I swear, media and pop culture has made people believe too much in popularity and makes you think that any fall is a bad one, and that a laughing stock is humiliating and not desirable.

This is just stupid.

[ChatOmbre]

That's high school level joking. This thirteen year old just wasn't psychologically mature enough to have a little fun. I mean we gave one of our wrestlers (Big Head) a bobblehead trophy, with a big head.

The crybaby award was a chance at a little social fun for the kid. I cannot believe he just couldn't flow with the joke. Trying hard to be in the game isn't bad, and this, being an awards banquet, was not discouraging him from it in any serious way, but was just poking a little harmless fun.

I swear, media and pop culture has made people believe too much in popularity and makes you think that any fall is a bad one, and that a laughing stock is humiliating and not desirable.

This is just stupid.

He might've been able to pull it off had he tried, but it was still a mean and childish prank that they pulled. I also think it was wrong of the coach to call him and say that before making a fool of him.

[Roadkill]

The only thing perhaps mean and childish is that the COACH had called them and told them to be sure to be there. Other than that, it all sounds norm to me. What has the kid learned in all his years of school, if he is so socially inept as to take something like this so hard?

[Megafrost]

The way I see it, the kid was singled out. It isn't just simply the fact that they were joking about his whining, it's that they joked only about him. They didn't say anything positive at all about him, and it seems that they didn't say anything negative about anybody else.

The kid begged to be in the game, and instead of them seeing the kid as being enthusiastic or wanting to contribute to the team, they chose to see it as moaning and whining.

[Neerowolf]

Isn't it wonderful wow much people can be assholes?

Roadkill, what if you made, lets say, your way to the end of ROTC, and there was an award banquet. Everyone in the program was there, and there was high expectations for you. Everyone in the course received trophies on performance and dedication, and when they called you up last, they gave you a trophy spelling your name wrong and saying "Least likely to ever be in the Airforce" Where everyone laughed at you. Afterwards, they teased you about it. Thats not a joke you can shrug off, because what will you say? "Oh, I worked hard for this trophy?" It's about time you realize that in that situation, no one is laughing with you, they're laughing AT you. They're not going to say "I'm sure they didn't mean it," they would say something like "wow, I guess I never noticed how bad you were."

Thats about the same, if not worse, to a 13 yr old. If you look back, I'm sure you would find yourself looking at a kid who didn't like to be made fun of to that extent. I know now that if I make a mistake or say something stupid, I go with it and laugh it off, but if someone makes a huge deal out of my demoralization, then it's not very funny anymore. Especially with an entire team laughing at you. Really think back, because I'm SURE that this has some internal relevance to you. I know people think other people's opinions are less than their own (not singling out RK, I think it too very often) but really consider this.

[Evlfrost]

Time to show my assholish nature...

The kid is just plain stupid. Hes going to be one of those losers who go and see shrinks because someone cut them off on the freeway. If you get the crybaby award, for heavens sake, DONT CRY ABOUT IT! Thats just going to reaffirm what they were already thinking. If your self esteem is low enough to be bothered about something like this, then grow some balls and take this like a man. Make the most out of the situation. I would have been up there making a grand speech about it. Just learn to laugh at the shit life throws at you. If you cant detach your self esteem from other peoples opinions, then you should try to change their opinions by proving them wrong. Instead of crying about getting the crybaby award, just act tough and let everyone know that it doesnt faze you. Youll look a whole lot less like a crybaby.

However, that was rather asinine on the coaches part. If a coach is going to be around kids, they have to know how stupid these kids can get (lets remember not to hurt their 'self esteem'). I think it was meant to be a cute joke on the teams part. The misspelling was probably accidental, though it could have been a sutble prod on his honor roll status. I suspect the reason why the coach called the kid to confirm his attendance was to make sure the joke didnt fizzle.

All in all, I suggest telling the coach off and giving the kid this link.

[tsian]

Wow. How callously cold. The award was mean spirited and probably uncalled for.

If your self esteem is low enough to be bothered about something like this, then grow some balls and take this like a man. Make the most out of the situation

Spoken like someone who has never had or doesn't understand self-esteem problems.

[shahmask]

the coach is not there to do things like that. it is not his place. the school doesn't hire teachers and staff to belittle the kids that are there.

he is not some pain in the rear high school student. he is an employee of the district. you don't see a math teacher or a band teacher or a principle doing something like this, do u? although, id say math teachers and band teachers usually have more sense than male coaches.

[TerraFrost]

That's high school level joking. This thirteen year old just wasn't psychologically mature enough to have a little fun.

one has to have a fairly comfortable relationship with someone before they can joke around with that person. if the coach didn't have that kind of relationship, he shouldn't have been joking around.

further, while it may be, as you say, a "high school level joke", the coach ISN'T a high school student, nor should he act like one.

The crybaby award was a chance at a little social fun for the kid. I cannot believe he just couldn't flow with the joke.

how exactly would he flow with the joke? as evl pointed out, i think he's actually "flowing" with it quite effectively. he's being a "crybaby" about getting a "crybaby" award. what more did you expect? what more did the coach expect? honestly, if the coach didn't see this coming, he deserves the stupidest coach of the year award.

Trying hard to be in the game isn't bad, and this, being an awards banquet, was not discouraging him from it in any serious way, but was just poking a little harmless fun.

i thought people whined and became crybabies to *avoid* hard work. ie. "please, give me an a! i didn't do the work required, but still! my life will be over if i don't get an a! *cries*". how is it harmless fun to reduce all the kids hard work into little more than that?

a laughing stock is humiliating and not desirable.

you're right - being a laughing stock isn't necessarily humiliating and undesirable, BUT... if you were FORCED to be the laughing stock, when you DIDN'T want to be, i would say it rather is humiliating and undesirable...

[Roadkill]

a laughing stock is not as scary as you think, if you just take it and have fun with it. I like how Evl worded it best.

additionally, i think you are pulling stuff out the "crybaby" title of the reward -- The crybaby part could just have been how he begged to be in the game, not the fact that he didn't work at practice and complained there. It said nothing else in the article.

ANd if he was like that, so what? Honestly, people like that on any kind of sports team (personal experience) should not be encouraged to stay.

[ChatOmbre]

ANd if he was like that, so what? Honestly, people like that on any kind of sports team (personal experience) should not be encouraged to stay.

I find your use of the word 'team' there amusing. Are you not supposed to support every other memeber of your team, even if you don't like them very much?

[TerraFrost]

a laughing stock is not as scary as you think, if you just take it and have fun with it. I like how Evl worded it best.

and exactly how scary do i think it is? i only said it's scary if you don't *want* to be the laughing stock - ie. you don't want to take it and have fun with it. you seem to think this kid's sole purpose in life should be to appease other, even if doing so would require some sort of sadomasochism on his part. i know what you're gonna say - that it shouldn't cause him any mental pain if he doesn't want it to. of course, you should also know that people can't just snap their fingers and change what they think. people can't just snap away phobias, and neither can people just snap away schizophrenia, or whatever. if you don't like something, you don't like something, and, short of seeing a shrink for years, there's not a whole lot you can do about it.

additionally, i think you are pulling stuff out the "crybaby" title of the reward -- The crybaby part could just have been how he begged to be in the game, not the fact that he didn't work at practice and complained there. It said nothing else in the article.

perhapes, but i think you, yourself, are trying to push stuff out. i mean, did the article not say that the coach said that all he did was whine? and anyway, i don't think the intentions behind the joke are what count, but rather, the perceptions. if the coach was on a comfortable enough level with the student to joke around, he should have known how it would be percieved. conversly, if he didn't know how it would be percieved, he didn't have a good enough relationship with the student to joke around, in the first place.