Is God a Tapeworm?

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Is God a Tapeworm?

Postby Dracofrost » Tue Jun 03, 2003 7:22 am

What are you thoughts on the possibility of God being a tapeworm? I believe that it is, indeed, a possibility at the least that God is, indeed, a tapeworm. I mean, if you were a god, wouldn't you want your clones to be happy? And what would be a happier existence than that of a parasite, living off the hard work of others while enjoying the simple things, like making people hungry? Truely, tapeworms and other parasites are those favored by God. I mean, they pretty much get a lifetime vacation with job pay, yah? What's even more ironic though, is that we sit here believing that we ourselves are the chosen of god and end up blissfully working our lives away while an honorable few us provide happiness for the true chosen, the seemingly meager but truely enviable tapeworm. Thusly, I would like to pass a motion that the lyrics of the song "Needles" by System Of A Down, which include the line "Pull the tapeworm out of your ass, hey!" are thusly heretical, in that they advocate causing pain and discomfort to the tapeworms, and deprive them of their life vacation in the mortal realm.
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Postby OmegaFrost » Tue Jun 03, 2003 3:28 pm

Whats frightening is that that makes sense! O.o
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Postby Gigafrost » Thu Jun 05, 2003 4:53 am

Well, let me see, the argument for the possibility goes as so:

DEDUCTIVE-RELATED THOUGHTS
1. If a specie was God's clone then they would be happy.
2. Tapeworms are "happy."
3. Therefore Tapeworms are God's clone.
4. If God's clone are Tapeworms then God is a Tapeworm.
5. Therefore God is a tapeworm.

First, I'd like to point out the logical problem with creating line 3. It actually does not follow from 1 and 2 that 3 is true (which is what the "therefore" implies) so the statement is no longer DEDUCTIVE. (For that matter, some of the premisses are questionable anyways, but nevermind that).

ABDUCTIVE-RELATED THOUGHTS
Well, since abduction looks to explain the observation, this would seem more like what you're doing, yet there are problems with it.

For starters, you could apply the same reasoning to any parasite, so there's no reason to believe that God is any one parasite over another then. In addition, according to the suprise principal we don't have a reason to believe that tapeworms are either God's clones or not God's clones. You see, either way the tapeworms would still live an easy life unless you add ideas for yours, but then it becomes more complicated and it makes the idea that they're not God's clones more likely.

IDEAS FOR NON-PHILOSOPHERS
So, I can agree that God might possible want it's clones to be happy, however what makes "easiest life" the happiest? ^_~
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Postby Nyufrost » Thu Jun 05, 2003 5:10 am

From a non-philosopher's point of view ...

When I first read Draco's initial post I have to admit that I laughed so hard that I was crying and my stomach hurt so bad I thought I would puke. Then I realized that perhaps he was trying to make a serious point.

I think he *does* have a good point in that man has to work hard and make sacrifices and efforts that insects and other animals do not have to make but the idea of a God being a tapeworm is a bit ludcrous, IMO.

For one reason, tapeworms are not the only parasite with an easy life, as Giga pointed out and also there are other insects that can withstand fire, flood, nuclear explosions and still live ... I speak of cockroaches which are said to be indestructable.

Secondly, in the beginning of the Bible --which we must take into account when talking about God-- it says that God created man in his own image and told him to go forth and multiply. It does not say that God created the tapeworm in his own image and told it to go forth and infest the bowels of hapless animals.

Finally, in religious teachings, it is said that God's plan for man is to be good and virtuous. That is not exactly easy. In fact, it is far easier to be mean and rude and evil. The tapeworm seems to best fit in the latter category.
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Postby Dracofrost » Fri Jun 06, 2003 6:36 am

Well, in light of Giga's post, I have realized the lack of real evidence for my strange hypothosis, so Occam's Razor shall now cut down another random theory of mine... bleh.
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Postby Javafrost » Sun Jun 08, 2003 6:17 am

Why does God have to be only one thing?
Whether or not the premises for the proposal are in question, the motion remains:
I would like to pass a motion that the lyrics of the song "Needles" by System Of A Down, which include the line "Pull the tapeworm out of your ass, hey!" are thusly heretical...

I second!
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Postby WRB » Tue Jun 10, 2003 1:52 am

Well, I think that one) Draco was watching the TV from five inches away when he made this theory, and two) everyone says that god is evrywhere, so why couldnt he be within the mind of the "Father Tapeworm?" Then, theres the fact that Giga put the list in the wrong order. God makes tapeworms in his image, and they are born happy as a rusult. Very simple, if you think about it (which I sadly did). And to reply to the thing about the bible, are you really going to trust a guy who goes around in his bath robe? Plus I dont think he ate fresh fish... The only thing thats wrong about Dracos theory is the "Needles" song refrence. Would you pull gods clone out of you butt if you knew they were happy?
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Postby Neerowolf » Wed Jun 25, 2003 4:17 pm

what would a clone of god be doing up someones butt, anyway?

isn't it like god being up your butt?

WHAT WOULD HE BE DOING UP THERE?

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Postby Nyufrost » Sat Jun 28, 2003 2:17 am

I think Draco had a unique idea but it was proven to him, by Giga's excellent logic, that God is not a tapeworm. ;)
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Postby TerraFrost » Sat Jun 28, 2003 2:57 am

well, giga didn't prove that god isn't a tapeworm - just that you can't prove he's a tapeworm, as opposed to anything else, sorta.
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Postby Nyufrost » Sat Jun 28, 2003 10:17 pm

Well, my point was sort of that Draco gave up and moreorless surrendered to Giga's logic therefore people should stop beating him over the head for his ill-fated theory. :p
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Postby Roadkill » Sun Jun 29, 2003 3:44 am

i think we should all quit with the old "god is the tapeworm" crap, and think about what one of my not-to-bright freinds suggested. Maybe god's a commie. Maybe hitler and Stalin were really saints.

And i disagree that god is happy idea -- god is in between happy and sad, just as he is inbetween good and bad, no?
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Postby Gigafrost » Sun Jun 29, 2003 5:26 am

Don't make me show that you can't prove he's a commie. :-p
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Postby TerraFrost » Sun Jun 29, 2003 6:19 am

the Christian god is good. likewise, he is all powerful. if he wasn't these things, then he wouldn't be the christian god :lila:

now, not all gods are like the christian god, however. likewise, not all gods are all powerful, and not all gods are all good...

now as far as some other god is concerned... he / she can do /be whatever they want, heh :)
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Postby WRB » Sun Jun 29, 2003 2:52 pm

Oh, but the Christian god cant? ARE YOU TRYIN TO SAY THAT GOD CANT DO WHAT HE WANTS!?! HUH!?! I suppose the seriphs would keep him from drinken to much and drivin drunk...
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